18 things your teacher wants you to know before parents' evening
Aneira Davies
ContributorWhether you child's parents' evening is back in person or still on Zoom this year, here's how to get the most out of those precious 10 minutes with their teacher!
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1. Don’t take your child with
As tempting as it seems (especially if you can't get the childcare), teachers would MUCH rather you leave your child at home than take them with you.
It means your focus will solely be on the meeting, not on whether your child wants a snack or not.
If you're struggling to get a sitter, ask if Zoom is an option (but make sure you lock yourself in a room with the computer/phone if it is, to avoid interruptions!)
2. Check your microphone works ok
If yours is still on Zoom this year, don't leave it until the time of the appointment to try the link and test your audio works. Do a test 15 minutes before and have a charger ready!
3. Take some questions along
Come up with a list of questions you'd like to ask your child's teacher in advance so you’ll know exactly what to ask when you meet them.
But, be concise.
Teachers won’t have the time to answer every question you have and you're only allotted a certain time slot, so keep questions to only what you REALLY want to know. Keep to three questions max.
4. Remember to ask what your child would like to know
Sit down with your child beforehand and ask if there’s anything they’d like to know about their education or how they’re getting on at school.
It's important they feel listened to as well, so why not give them the chance?
5. Make your child the focus of the evening
Parents' evenings are not the place for school politics or other matters. Teachers are well-trained to stick to the topic ... your child.
6. Make sure you read the teacher's notes beforehand
Reading up on school reports about your child will give you a better understanding of what their teacher is likely to talk to you about.
It will also help you figure out what you’d like to talk to them about, if there’s anything that concerns you, or makes you proud about your child.
7. Don’t just ask the obvious
Besides 'how well they're doing', raise any issues or worries your child might have.
Ask them beforehand if there is anything that bothers them about school, like playtime, tests or a particular subject.
8. Don’t assume you’ll hear good things about your child’s behaviour
Your child may act differently at school, so be open to anything their teacher says. Arrange to follow it up later, if it comes as a surprise to you. That way you can process it, chat to your child and address it calmly with all the information to hand.
9. Remember that most teachers will be on your child’s side
... And will want the best for them.
You're both there for your child, remember?
10. Ask what you can do to help
If your child is struggling with a particular subject, or finding making friends hard, ask what you can do to help them. After all, you can also learn from your child's teacher.
And, rather than dwelling on your child’s negative behaviour, it's a good idea to make a plan for your child going forward.
11. Take a notebook with you
Take a notebook along to parents' evening so you can write down any useful info your child’s teacher may give you.
Then you won't forget what websites they've told you to look at, or apps they've suggested, as soon as you get home.
12. Be positive about your child’s achievements
And make sure you don’t put them down, even if they’re not great at maths. It's all about encouraging them.
13. Don’t ask how they’re doing in comparison to the rest of the class
It’s not helpful to compare your child to others in their class, say teachers, as every child is different.
14. Try not to overrun with time
Teachers have a lot of parents to see and some have even taken time off to be there, so keep to your allotted time slot. You'd be annoyed if the person before you ran on and on, so don't do the same to others waiting after you.
15. Make sure you turn up
Put it in your diary, set an Alexa reminder ... anything to make sure you are present and correct. Teachers are busy enough without having to reschedule because you forgot.
16. You may need a co-parenting slot
If you’ve split up from your child’s other parent, then don’t assume you’ll get a slot each. You may need to attend the same appointment, together. Never easy.
17. It's a two-way conversation
Remember it’s a two-way conversation – you’re allowed to ask questions, too! Discuss with your partner what's on your mind so he knows what you want to cover and doesn't go off on a tangent!
18. Raise any issues year-round
It's helpful for teachers to know what's going on year-round, so if there's anything bothering your child, speak to your teacher as soon as possible ahead of parents' evening.
A 10-minute slot isn't long enough to discuss a bigger issue and besides, it could be dealt with and forgotten about by the time parents' evening comes along.
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