Things only parents TRYING to work from home with kids know
Charlotte Grant-West
Netmums contributorWith seemingly no end in sight for when lockdown will be lifted, WFH is going to be the only feasible option for most for a while yet. But if you're trying to juggle that with childcare too, it's a seriously testing time.
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If you've ever tried working from home when the kids are in situ, then the viral video of political science reporter Robert Kelly being interviewed on the BBC – and interrupted by his daughter sashaying into shot – will definitely have resonated with you.
One minute you're trying to look professional on a work call, the next you're being fully upstaged by a half-naked toddler telling you about the colour and consistency of his most recent poo.
During lockdown so far parents' multi-tasking skills have been well and truly tested.
Here is a lighthearted look at the things every parent who's TRIED to work from home with their kids around can relate to.
1 Kids don't respect boundaries
You've tried shutting the door, you've reinstated the baby gate and you've told them 'mummy/ daddy is busy working'.
But STILL they find a way of making your working day all about them.
And if you've been forced to work from home thanks to coronavirus, then your house might not be set up for working. Being surrounded by kids' toys, on the sofa or working from bed (well, why not?!) makes it even more difficult to create a boundary between work and little ones.
Sure working from bed sounds excellent in theory but when the kids want to snuggle up to you and / or have a pillow fight when you're filling in a spreadsheet you just. can't. concentrate.
2 More hands please
Oh, to be an octopus.
Then you'd have enough hands for typing, cleaning up their discarded lunch, changing nappies, sitting in on a Skype call, putting a wash on, grabbing a cuppa, soothing a toddler who's banged her knee and actually doing your job ...
Oh wait ... you've run out of hands.
SEE, even octopuses (octopi?!) couldn't cope.
3 It's 'business' from the waist up, 'slob' from the waist down
There's nothing better than working in your PJs, but sometimes it's more of a necessity than a choice. Just when would you find the time in the morning to put a pair of proper trousers on anyway?
In between getting everyone up, making breakfast and cleaning up the jam your three-year-old insisted on going 'Jackson Pollock' with, there is ZERO TIME for making yourself look half presentable.
... oh lordy, and now there's a call scheduled for 9am with accounts.
*grabs a blazer, brushes hair with a fork*
Five mins later ...
You feel pretty pleased with how the call went, until you realise you have jam on your chin.
4 You've run out of things to entertain them with
They're bored of Peppa Pig, all the important bits are missing from their Lego set and it's raining (again). How an earth will you entertain them now?!
You might have to go old school and get a jigsaw out / make a den / raid the arts and crafts drawer (until you remember that although the kids like nothing better than gluing glittery pasta to cardboard and messing around with pipe cleaners, we categorically HATE the clean-up that comes after).
Well, at least you can finish that report in peace.
Until someone shouts that they've lost a piece of pasta up their nose.
FFS.
And, to avoid any potential colourful accidents on your fresh-painted walls, we've found this life (and mess) - saving set of washable dot markers that also comes complete with designs to fill in. You can find them here at Amazon .
5 Your child wants to become a new member of your team
Kids love to get involved in other people's business.
Miranda from accounts is sharing a fascinating insight into data for the last month and your youngest interrupts with 'daaaaad, why does that lady have a hair on her chin?'
Then George from PR is brainstorming ideas on a new project and your child interjects with: 'why doesn't he have hair on the top of his head?'
Jeez, why don't you tell my colleagues what you really think of them, kiddo?
If it wasn't bad enough that they're highlighting other people's features and flaws, they then have the audacity to declare something like:
'My daddy has his pyjama bottoms on.'
Are you kidding me?!
6 Your children become your PA
You sure didn't have a personal assistant when you were working in the office, but now you're at home your children have gleefully taken on the task of 'sorting' your paperwork and answering the door.
Every time the doorbell rings off they run to answer it (normally half naked).
They feel SO grown-up signing for things and telling the delivery person you're busy working.
It's all going so well and you have to admit it's good having an extra pair of hands, until you realise your eldest has signed you up for a monthly direct debit payment to Save the Liver-Spotted Yorkshire Newt.
Darn it!
7 You don't realise quite how loud kids are
We know they can shriek, holler and caterwaul at the weekend but who knew the new decibel levels they'd reach during your for your working day.
They love to be surrounded by background noise too – Peppa Pig, Cbeebies and David Walliams' latest story CD on repeat for hour after hour.
And why is it that the minute you're on a work call they like to TURN IT UP SO LOUD YOU CAN BARELY HEAR YOURSELF THINK.
Before you know it you've had the (albeit dulcet tones) of David Walliams as background noise for eight hours straight and you could recite the narrative to Grandpa's Great Escape in your sleep.
Don't worry though, it's only another two hours until they put Peppa Pig on again.
Are you working from home with kids at the moment? Share your tips and tricks in the chat thread below.
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This article contains affiliate links, which means we may earn a small amount of money if a reader clicks through and makes a purchase. All our articles and reviews are written independently by the Netmums editorial team.
