100 things all new parents need to know

Becoming a mum or dad is incredible. But the arrival of your baby means your life changes beyond all recognition. To help you through those early days, weeks and months of your baby’s life, here are 100 things every new parents needs to know…

Sleep will return to your life, even though it might not feel like it when your baby has been up most of the night. Again.

You won't be sleep-deprived forever. By four months old, your baby could be spending around twice as long sleeping at night as they do during the day.

Babies love routine. But in the first few weeks of your baby’s life, any sort of routine is pretty impossible, mainly because your baby’s body clock won’t have kicked in yet.

After a few weeks, you’ll start seeing sleep patterns forming and this is a good time to start setting up a loose routine.

Just remember every baby is different and the routine that works for your friend’s baby might not necessarily work for yours.

…or on your shoulder.

No one will notice. And if they do, who cares?

Seriously, if you even find time to brush your hair, you're winning.

Child Benefit, Universal Credit, Maternity Allowance… there are lots of benefits you may be entitled to now that you’re a parent.

Learn more in our guide to benefits for new and expecting parents.

It’s probably not a topic you EVER thought you’d talk about about, but as soon as you become a parent you’ll discover your new obsession is baby poo. Or, more specifically: how often your baby is going, what colour it is, and whether it’s normal.

Your baby’s poo is important and can give you an indication of their overall health. From the newborn meconium to the different consistencies, here’s all you need to know about baby poo.

Feel like your baby has been feeding non-stop?

Cluster feeding – when your baby is almost constantly feeding – is totally normal, especially if you're breastfeeding.

It often happens in the evenings or at night and might be down to your baby preparing for a growth spurt or not eating as much in the day.

Cluster feeding can also help to regulate the mum's milk supply, so it's nothing to worry about.

Seriously, you’re doing an awesome job looking after your baby. The hoovering and dishes can wait.

It’s hard not to compare babies when your friend’s baby is sitting up, while your little one hasn’t even rolled over yet.

Just remember: every baby is different. Your baby will develop at their own rate and in their own time. If you have any concerns, you can chat to your health visitor.

Looking after your baby can be exhausting and overwhelming.

There's no shame in admitting that you’re struggling, so talk to your partner, family and friends if you need to.

Your health visitor can also help you with advice and parenting support.

You can also visit our Drop-In Clinics for professional help with everything from baby health to sleep. Trained parent supporters are waiting to take your questions every weekday evening.

... no matter what your partner or mates without kids might think.

Be proud of yourself and recognise how hard you’re working to care for your baby.

This means it’s important to make sure they don't get too hot or too cold.

The ideal temperature for your baby’s bedroom is 18°C. A range between 16°C and 20°C is comfortable.

To keep an eye on the temperature, it’s worth buying a bedroom thermometer. The Gro Egg 2 by Tommee Tippee displays the room temperature and can be used as a nightlight, too. See more details here at Amazon.

Find out more about what to dress your baby in at night.

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Your baby’s immune system isn’t as strong as yours.

To reduce the chance of them getting an infection, always sterilise bottles, teats and any other feeding equipment each time before use.

Find out more about sterilising and making up bottles here.

It’s not uncommon to have sore or cracked nipples a few days after you start breastfeeding. This is usually down to your baby not being positioned or attaching properly.

If your nipples are cracked or bleeding, talk to a breastfeeding expert or your health visitor.

Hand-expressing some breastmilk and massaging onto your nipples at the end of a feed can also help.

Lansinoh's Lanolin cream can help to soothe and protect cracked and sore nipple. See more details here at Amazon.

Find out more about what to do if you have sore or cracked nipples from breastfeeding here.

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It's great to get parenting advice, but always remember that you know your baby better than anyone.

What works for one baby might not work for yours, so trust your instincts.

Nappy sacks pose a real danger of suffocation if your baby or toddler gets hold of them.

Always keep nappy sacks out of reach of your baby and away from their cot.

Also, you should never leave your baby unattended at changing time.

When your baby is tiny it can be hard to find time for a cup of tea, let alone a shower.

Don’t put any pressure on yourself; if you’re still in your pyjamas at 5pm, it really doesn’t matter.

Whether you’re breastfeeding or bottle-feeding your baby, it’s important to know the signs that they're hungry.

Early signs of hunger include your baby getting restless, turning their head and opening their mouth. Your baby will also find something to suck on, most likely their fist or fingers.

Look out for these early signs. if you wait until your baby starts crying, they may be too fussy to feed well.

Colic is the name for unexplained, prolonged crying. It can start when your baby is around two or three weeks old and often passes by the time they are between four and six months old. Around 20% of babies become colicky.

Our Netmums members have shared their tips for coping with colic here – including playing white noise or giving your baby a warm bath, so take a look if you're struggling.

Honestly, we promise.

Your health visitor isn’t just there to help with your baby. They can also give you parenting support and even relationship advice.

On top of that, they can refer you to your GP, or to services like relationship counsellors at Relate if needed.

They've seen it all before, and will never judge you, so do reach out if you have any questions or concerns.

After nine months of pregnancy and then giving birth, it’s natural that your body will change.

And even if you're struggling to accept your new shape or stretch marks, just remember how utterly amazing your body is. It’s carried your baby!

When you’re a sleep-deprived new parent, sex is often the last thing on your mind. In our Let’s Talk About Sex survey, 78% of parents we spoke to said they had less sex after having children.

Yet when you feel ready, there are ways to get your love life back in shape. Find out how with our sex tips for new parents.

As a new parent, hacks are essential. One of our favourite tips is this genius way of taking off a baby grow without having to pull it over your baby’s head.

Those envelope folds on the shoulders of the baby grow are there to let you slide the outfit down your baby’s body, rather than over their head.

Plus, this serves as an essential parenting trick if you're facing another 2am poonami!

Official NHS advice tells parents not to use pillows or duvets with babies under 12 months old.

According to charity The Lullaby Trust, using a pillow in your baby's cot makes SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) two and a half times more likely to occur.

The safest place for your baby to sleep in the first six months is in a cot in your room, with no loose linen, cot bumpers or toys. Find out more about baby sleep safety here.

Sleep is essential for your baby's growth and development. It helps their nervous system develop and even boosts their immune system.

According to the NHS, newborn babies can sleep for anything from eight hours to 18 hours a day!

By the time your baby is four months old, they'll need about 12 to 16 hours – split between a nighttime sleep and a couple of daytime naps.

It’s totally normal to doubt yourself as you get to grips with being a parent.

But honestly, you’re doing an amazing job. Be proud of yourself.

Bottled water isn’t sterile and could contain too much salt, so it’s not recommended you use this to make your baby’s feed.

Instead, use freshly boiled water. Here's all you need to know about making up your baby's formula feed.

A good dose of fresh air could help you – and your baby – sleep better at night, according to research.

Getting out of the house will also make you feel better. And if you’re stuck for inspiration on where to go, our Netmums SeeSaw app has listings of baby-friendly activities near you.

At any given time, a third of babies and toddlers will have nappy rash, which is a sore, red rash on their bottoms.

You can help prevent nappy rash by regularly changing your baby’s nappy and using a barrier cream such as zinc or petroleum jelly which will help to protect their skin from contact with wee or poo.

If you can, it’s a good idea to let your baby go without a nappy for short periods – it might be good to do this before bathtime in case things get messy!

... and that's OK. Much as we'd love them to, babies don't come with instruction manuals.

Always remember you’re doing the best job you can.

And if you want to chat to other mums, you can post in our forum where our Netmums members share parenting tips and advice.

If you're breastfeeding, leaking milk from your boobs is totally normal. Take breast pads with you if you’re going out and, if you’re worried you might leak, bring a spare top just in case.

You can washable breast pads, which are obviously more eco-friendly. See more details here.

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As a new parent, you’re probably quickly discovering that if your baby needs liquid paracetamol or other medicine, it can often be impossible getting them to take it.

Try this genius parenting hack of putting the medicine syringe in the teat of a baby bottle.

A dream feed involves picking your baby up when they're asleep and feeding them while they're drowsy. The theory behind dream feeds is they could help your little one (and you) sleep through the night, thanks to a nice full tummy.

You can introduce a dream feed when your baby is just a few weeks old – most then drop them at around six months.

Dream feeds won’t suit every baby but if you want to give it a go, you can read more about read more about dream feeds here.

Up to half of new mums experience the ‘baby blues’ and feel depressed or anxious in the weeks after giving birth. And one in 10 mums suffers from postnatal depression (PND).

It's not just mums who suffer either – these days, it's thought that just as many new dads suffer from PND, too.

If you are feeling depressed, don’t hide it. Instead, talk to your family and friends or your health visitor. They can refer you on to your GP or a local PND support group.

Find out more about the signs and symptoms of postnatal depression here.

It's good for your baby to get used to your household noise – and to be able to sleep through it.

This means there’s no need to tiptoe around when your baby sleeps in the day. Take the opportunity of your baby being asleep to get on with anything you need to – or to rest!

It's a good idea to keep things calm, quiet and dark at night though, especially at first. This will help your baby to learn the difference between night and day.

Make sure your baby’s bath isn’t too hot or too cold by using a bath thermometer. The water should be between 37°C.

When Myleene Klass revealed that her family and friends tried her breastmilk, lots of our Netmums admitted they – or their partners – had tried breastmilk as well.

And why not? Especially since it’s packed with nutrients and your baby seems to find it delicious!

...literally from the moment you give birth. No, we don’t know why either.

It’s entirely up you whether you bottle-feed or breastfeed your baby.

Don’t feel any pressure to feed in a way you don’t want to – always remember it’s your decision.

Having a baby is amazing but it can also feel a bit lonely at times.

Making friends with other parents will be a lifeline for you – and someone to have a cup of tea with (when restrictions allow!), and to share the highs and lows of parenting with.

You can find local mums to chat to in our forum or try these seven simple ways to make mum friends.

Yep, thanks to the endless photos you'll be taking of your baby.

You will also plan to make photo books, but never get round to it. Hey, who has the time?

If you don’t feel you’ve connected with your health visitor, don’t feel you have to stick with them.

You can call their line manager and ask if you can see someone else.

Your baby will be feeding lots in the early weeks so make sure you’re comfortable.

Find your comfiest chair and set up a ‘breastfeeding station’ with a big bottle of water to stay hydrated, some biscuits, magazines … and the remote control.

Check out our top breastfeeding essentials.

Remember the names Dr Ranj and Andy Day.

When your baby is a bit older, these children’s TV presenters will be your secret guilty crush … along with thousands of other parents!

Your baby’s first real smile is likely to happen when they're between four and eight weeks old.

And it’s an incredible moment you’ll NEVER forget. Awww.

When you’re breastfeeding, it can be hard to know if your baby is getting enough milk. Regular wet and dirty nappies, along with hearing your baby swallow and your baby being calm during feeds are all signs that they're feeding well.

If you’re worried, you can ask your health visitor, midwife or a breastfeeding specialist to watch your baby feed.

Being a parent is awesome – but it’s also exhausting.

And given happy parents make happy babies, it’s important you make time for yourself.

Of course, ‘me time’ is a bit different now you’re a parent. But whether it’s a soak in the bath or a yoga class, if you can, try and make sure you have some time to yourself every day.

If your baby is drawing their legs up to their tummy, this could be a sign that they've got wind.

To help your baby, try gently rubbing their tummy in a clockwise direction. You can also lay your baby on their back and gently move their legs in a cycling motion to help release any trapped wind.

Tongue-tie is where the strip of skin connecting your baby's tongue to the bottom of their mouth is shorter than usual. It affects between four and 11% of newborn babies and is sometimes spotted during your baby’s routine newborn check.

Signs your baby has tongue-tie include struggling to attach properly if you’re breastfeeding and not putting on weight as quickly as they should.

If you’re concerned, talk to your health visitor, midwife or GP.

Your newborn’s poo is called meconium and has a sticky, tar-like consistency.

It can be hard to wipe off your baby’s bottom, so try rubbing a dab of petroleum jelly onto their bottom before their first nappy. This will make it easier to wipe the meconium off.

As a new parent, chances are it won’t be long before you hear the advice from your parents or in-laws that you’re holding your baby too much.

Ignore them; it’s impossible to cuddle your baby too much. Trust your instincts and do what feels right for you and your baby.

Gah, there’s always one parent who can’t resist boasting that their baby slept through from a few weeks old.

And it's not what you want to hear when your baby has you up every few hours. Our top tip? Don’t listen to them, and also don’t forget: all babies are different.

The average baby gets through a staggering 4,000 nappies from the moment they're born until they're potty trained. Eek.

To make sure you don’t get caught out when your baby does a massive poo, download the NCT’s Babychange app for iPhone or Android and it’ll direct you to the nearest baby changing facilities.

Seriously, you’ve just had a baby. Your friends and family can make their own cuppa. And one for you while they’re at it.

White noise – the sound of a Hoover or a washing machine, for example – is incredibly soothing for babies.

Experts say this is because it’s similar to the sounds your baby heard in the womb.

So if your baby won’t sleep, try turning on a fan or investing in a white noise app.

Rather than waste money on a whole tub of formula powder – and then finding out it doesn’t suit your baby – try buying a few different ready-made cartons instead.

That way, you can work out which formula is best for your baby.

Get more tips on choosing the right formula.

… or eat a hot meal. Instead, just as you sit down for a cuppa or your dinner, your baby is likely to start crying. Sob.

As your baby gets older you’ll want to have toys for them to play with. To save money, check out your local charity shops or our Netmums nearly new board.

It can be hard to know when your baby is really poorly.

Warning signs to look out for include a high temperature, rapid breathing or panting, pale or blotchy skin and nappies that are dryer than usual.

If you think your baby is seriously ill, call 999 immediately. If you're not sure, you can always call 111 for advice.

That way, you won’t have to run up and down the stairs finding nappies and wipes when your baby needs changing.

If your baby is crying, one key tip from baby expert Dr Harvey Karp author of 'The Happiest Baby on the Block, is learning the five S's.

These are: swaddling, shushing, swinging, putting your baby in a side-on position, and giving your baby something to suck.

According to Dr Karp, all five have been shown to soothe a crying baby.

Check out more ways to soothe a crying baby.

It’s good to be prepared in case your baby has a leaky nappy while you’re out and about.

Pop a spare baby grow in your nappy bag so you can change their outfit if needed.

It’s never too early to start reading to your baby.

From newborn to three months, reading to your baby will help them to focus their eyes on images or symbols in the book. As they get older, they'll begin to recognise them.

And while your newborn won’t understand what you’re saying, they'll be able to hear the different tones in your voice.

Find out how to choose the best books for your baby.

If you’re bottle-feeding, you can use a dispenser pot to store the right amount of powder for a feed.

This is brilliant if you’re out, or in the middle of the night when your baby needs a bottle.

It’s guaranteed to go all over your clean duvet. Fact.

… even when you’re at home.

That way, you can do any chores that need doing while staying close to your baby.

Check out our guides to the best slings and baby carriers.

And that’s OK – especially in those early days and weeks when you’re adjusting to life as a parent and your hormones are all over the place.

However, if you feel constantly anxious or depressed, talk to your health visitor or your GP and they can offer you support.

Research carried out by London's Great Ormond Street Hospital (GOSH) found music can soothe your baby.

The research found that specific songs such as 'Hush a Bye Baby' and 'Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star' were shown to reduce pain and lower heart rates.

Time to make your baby's first playlist …

As a new parent, there’s just so much to remember, which isn't easy when you’re seriously sleep deprived.

Try using an app to record your baby’s feed times, which breast they ended on (if you’re breastfeeding) and how long the feed was.

... especially if you’re going to your first baby group by yourself.

Don’t worry; almost every other parent will be feeling the same and will be grateful for a chat and a friendly face.

You might think your tiny baby is months away from their first teeth appearing.

So, you might be surprised to know your baby could start teething from as young as three months old!

Signs your baby might be teething include sore and red gums where the tooth is coming through and a flushed cheek. They might also be dribbling more than usual.

Learn more about the signs of teething to look out for and how to soothe your teething baby.

If your baby's struggling to sleep, you might be wondering whether to try a sleep training technique. These include controlled crying, the ‘no cry’ method and gradual retreat.

Find out more about the different sleep training techniques and which one might suit your baby.

For many parents, it can feel like one moment your baby is a newborn, and the next they're a toddler.

Time goes so fast, so treasure every moment.

It’s important to stay hydrated when you’re breastfeeding. Our Netmums members recommend taking a bottle of water with you when you go out to stop you getting thirsty.

Shop around for the best nappies for your baby. Depending on your baby’s body shape, different brands might suit them better.

To check the nappy fits well, the tapes on the side of the nappy should reach the centre of the picture on the front of the nappy.

The leg cuffs should also fit nicely around your baby’s thighs. If they leave red marks or are leaking, try a different size nappy.

Check out our picks of the best nappies for newborns.

Swaddling is the practice of wrapping your baby tightly in a thin blanket or sheet for sleep. Make sure you don’t cover your baby’s head and also ensure they don't overheat.

Swaddling is a useful skill to learn for those times when your baby is overstimulated and cranky, helping to calm them down. It can also help soothe babies with colic and reflux.

Here’s all you need to know about swaddling your baby.

And don’t think the fact that you haven’t actually asked for advice will stop them. Nope.

Our Netmums members' suggestion? ‘Listen to all the advice then disregard 90% of it.’ Only you know what's best for your baby.

As you’ll have found out already, your baby's cry is designed to upset you … and not be ignored.

And while it might all sound the same at the moment, as you get to know your new baby better, you’ll start to recognise the different types of crying.

The three main reasons your baby cries are from hunger, from being uncomfortable and because their nappy needs changing.

Of course there are lots of other reasons, too. Here's all you need to know about what your baby’s cries mean.

In your baby’s red book, you’ve probably seen the growth and height centile charts. These charts show the pattern of growth healthy children usually follow.

However, every child is different, so don’t worry if your friend’s baby is on a totally different centile line to yours.

After the first two weeks, it’s recommended you take your baby to be weighed once a month until they're six months old.

You can then get your baby weighed once every two months between six and 12 months old.

As a general guide, every day your baby needs around 150-200ml of formula per kilo of their weight until they are six months old.

Every baby is different though, so it’s important to know the signs your baby is getting enough formula. These include a good weight gain and regular wet and dirty nappies.

Learn more with our top bottle-feeding tips.

Until they're six months old, the safest place for your baby to sleep is in a separate cot or Moses basket in your room.

Yet, there are times when you might want to co-sleep with your baby.

To do this safely, experts say you should NEVER co-sleep with your baby if:

- Either you or your partner is a smoker, even if you don't smoke at home.

- Either of you have been drinking alcohol or have taken drugs or medication which might cause drowsiness.

- Either of you is particularly overtired.

- Your baby was born prematurely (before 37 weeks) or was a low birth weight (less than 2.5kg or 5 1/2lb).

There are lots of other rules, too.

Sadly, co-sleeping without following the rules can increase the risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). So if you're thinking about trying it, be sure to read our guide to safe co-sleeping first.

The moment you spot your baby’s first tooth is VERY exciting.

While some babies are born with teeth, it’s more common for their first teeth to appear around five to seven months.

Your baby’s bottom front teeth will usually emerge first, followed by their top front teeth at between six and eight months.

Most children have all of their milk teeth by the age of two and a half.

Learn more about how long teething lasts.

As a new parent it’s only natural you’ll feel anxious at the thought of taking your baby out – on your own – for the first time.

Why not start small with a gentle walk round the block or to your local park? And when you feel more confident, why not head to a baby group or activity near you?

We’ve got all your baby-friendly local listings on our SeeSaw app.

Especially when they've stolen all the covers and are snoring away happily next to you when you’re up with the baby. Again.

Hurrah, you’ve made it out the house! So you don’t want to be caught short if your baby does a poo and you don’t have any spare nappies with you...

A good rule of thumb is to pack the number of nappies your baby usually goes through in a day, and a few extra just in case.

Aah, there’s nothing better than basking in the summer sunshine. But the NHS website advises keeping babies under the age of six months out of direct sunlight, especially around midday when the sun is at its strongest.

If your baby does get sunburn, either go indoors or move into the shade. Your baby’s skin is very fragile so if your baby has sunburn, you should contact your GP for advice.

Your baby will receive a number of vaccinations for illnesses and diseases – most of which will happen before they're one.

The NHS immunisation schedule starts when your baby is eight weeks old, followed by another appointment at 12 weeks, 16 weeks and then one year old.

Find out more about your baby’s immunisation schedule here.

The fourth trimester isn’t a medical term, but instead refers to the first three months of your baby’s life.

It can be an exhausting time for you as a parent. Your baby needs lots of comfort and reassurance as they adjust to life in the big wide world, and they might not want you to put them down. At all.

Swaddling, white noise and staying close to your baby can all help them during this ‘fourth trimester’.

You might think breastfeeding will come naturally for you and your baby, yet that isn’t always the case.

Some babies might take a while to learn to attach properly while you might struggle to find a good feeding position.

Don’t worry, this is totally normal. Your health visitor or midwife can give you help and support, or put you in touch with a breastfeeding specialist.

You can also check out our top breastfeeding tips, or visit our Breastfeeding Drop-In Clinic, where expert advisers are waiting to answer your questions every weekday evening.

You’ve finally settled into a routine with your baby, and suddenly they start crying every time you leave the room.

Separation anxiety usually kicks in when your baby is between six and eight months old. It usually develops when your baby starts to distinguish one person from another and realises you're separate to them.

Even though it can be hard to deal with, it’s a good sign because it shows how attached your baby is to you.

Get tips on dealing with separation anxiety.

Utterly, head-over-heels in love. Awwwww.

Sleeping with your baby on a chair or sofa can increase the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) by 50% according to charity The Lullaby Trust.

For the first six months, the safest place for your baby to sleep is in a separate cot or Moses basket in your room.

Learn more about safe sleeping for your baby.

Before you had your baby, chances are you’d go out to restaurants or the cinema for date nights with your partner.

Yet, as a new parent, the thought of leaving your baby for a few hours or having to arrange a babysitter can feel quite overwhelming.

This is why date nights at home are so genius. Here are our top tips for having a date night to remember.

You’ve taken your baby out for the day – the only problem is, you need to get petrol.

Whether you leave your baby in the car while you pay – or take them in with you – is an issue that divides parents.

Some say their baby is safer in the car while others say they wouldn’t leave their baby for a moment.

So, the official advice? Chris Cloke, head of safeguarding in the communities at the NSPCC, says, ‘When left alone in a vehicle, young children can very quickly start to get anxious and distressed.

‘Even if they're sleeping peacefully when you leave they could well wake up and get very upset when you're not there to look after them … Every child is different and every parent knows their child's readiness to be left in this scenario.’

Rolling over, sitting up, crawling … your baby has a LOT of developmental milestones to hit in their first year.

Your baby may be able to roll onto their back from four months, although it might not be until around five or six months that they can roll back and forth.

Many babies learn to sit up between four and seven months and start crawling any time between six and 11 months.

Don’t worry if other babies around you are reaching these milestones first. Every baby is different.

If you’re worried about your baby’s development, talk to your health visitor or GP.

There have been lots of headlines recently about sepsis, known as the ‘silent killer’.

Sepsis, also referred to as blood poisoning or septicaemia, is a potentially life-threatening condition, triggered by an infection or injury.

Early symptoms of sepsis usually develop quickly and can include a high temperature, chills and shivering, and fast breathing.

If you’re worried about your baby, go straight to A&E.

Tummy time (putting your baby down on their tummy, on your chest or the floor) helps your baby increase their strength in their head, neck and shoulders.

You can start tummy time for a minute or two a day as soon as your baby is born and gradually build up as they get older. Little and often works best.

However, don’t be surprised if your baby doesn’t like tummy time, especially at the beginning.

Try lying down on the floor with them and holding a toy in front of them to keep their attention.

Eczema is an itchy and sometimes sore skin irritation, and it now affects up to 20% of babies and children, making it the most common skin condition.

There’s no one known cause, but things like cold weather, dust mites and use of bubble bath could all be factors.

If your baby has eczema, it’s important to keep their skin well moisturised. Find out more about treating eczema in babies here.

Now your baby's here, you might be faced with a dilemma over work. Should you go back to your job, or ask for flexible working?

While there's no automatic right to reduce your hours or increase flexibility, some employers will be happy to consider cutting down your work, or perhaps organising a job share.

It’s definitely worth arranging a time to meet with your employers to chat through your options.

To help, we’ve got all you need to know about your employment rights as a new parent.

Really, you are. Go you!