Talking to your baby: why it matters and top tips
Polly Logan-Banks
Content EditorNo matter how young your baby is, they're never too young to talk to – it's what babies love! Find out how talking to your baby boosts their development and get tips on how to make the most out of this precious bonding time.
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Why should I talk to my baby?
There are so many great reasons to chat to your baby, including:
- It's a lovely way to bond with your baby!
- Your baby will probably be soothed by your voice. Even when they were in the womb, they'll have been able to hear your voice from late pregnancy onwards. Hearing it again now may help them to calm down and feel safe.
- It's amazing for your little one's language development. Even in the early days and weeks, talking to your baby will help them start to learn about the rhythm of language. As they grow, if you pause for your baby to babble back when you talk, they'll start to learn about turn-taking in conversation.
- Research shows that, the more words babies hear in their first few years of life, the better they do at school later on.
- Babies understand more than you think! From about nine months, babies will start to understand a few basic words – and the more you talk to them, the faster they'll learn!
These days, many experts are concerned that a lot of children have poor speech and language skills – they fear it's because their parents just aren't talking to them enough in their early years. So talking (and listening) to our kids is one of our most important roles as parents.
The more you talk to your baby or toddler, the better!
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Talking to your baby
In the first few months of your baby's life, it may seem that communication between you is a bit of a one-way street. But just because your baby can't talk yet, that doesn't mean they're not listening!
Even a newborn may be able to respond with their own special body language – pursing their lips, waving their arms, or, from around six weeks, offering you the ultimate reward for your troubles: a broad smile.
A great way to communicate with your baby in the early days is with mirroring – copying their facial expressions, actions and noises. Find out more about how to do mirroring here.
Once your baby begins to make their own sounds, usually first in the form of cooing, then babbling, you can respond by copying them. This will encourage them to keep on experimenting with their new 'language'.
As time passes and their skills progress, you can encourage them still further by keeping up the conversation - and giving them lots of opportunities to talk back.
Top tips for talking to your baby:
- Choose a good time for talking. There's no point (and it wouldn't be fair) to strike up a conversation with a baby who's tired or hungry. Don't press it if they don't seem in a sociable mood. Look for times when your baby is awake, alert and looking around them with interest.
- A tuneful, interesting voice in a slightly higher than normal pitch is most likely to get their attention. Many parents find they naturally use a higher, sing-song voice when talking to their baby anyway.
- Put your face close to you baby's when you talk, especially in the early days (newborns can only see clearly about 20cm-30cm in front of their face). Pull lively expressions, and make eye contact.
- If you're not sure what to talk about, just try giving a running commentary of whatever's going on at the time. Such as: 'Now we're pulling on your sock, isn't it a lovey, red sock?'
- Pay attention to what your baby's interested in, and talk to them about it while adding lots of detail. For example, if your baby is looking at a cat, saying 'look, a cat!' is a great start – but it's even better to say, 'look at that pretty grey cat. What's it doing? It's sitting down'. The more details you add, the more words you're helping your baby to learn!
- Set aside a certain amount of 'quiet time' every day for a chat. Turn off the telly or your music, put down your phone, and give your baby your complete attention for a little while.
- Repetitive rhymes and simple action songs like 'This Little Piggy', will help to teach your baby about language and communication.
- Singing's good, too. Don't worry if you can't hold a tune – your baby won't care!
- Reading to your baby is a wonderful way to pass on language skills, and it's never too early to start. In the early days, you can even read your favourite magazine or website out loud! Your baby won't know what you're saying, but it'll still help them to learn about language and feel close to you. You can also check out our picks of the best books for babies.
- Once your baby is making sounds of their own – gurgles and cooing is likely to come first, then babbling – make a point of listening carefully, then copying them. This will encourage your baby to keep experimenting. Now you really are having a conversation!
Tips for talking to your toddler:
- Always stop to listen to what they've got to say, and don't forget to respond.
- Get down to their level and make eye contact when chatting.
- Use body language when you talk to them – actions, gestures and facial expressions – to help them make sense of the words.
- It's fine to use 'parentese', using a simple, sing-song language your little one can relate to. But try to avoid babyspeak – say dog, not woof-woof!
- Ask your little one lots of questions. They'll soon start answering you.
- Try to name everything when you're talking, to boost their vocabulary. (And not just objects, but actions, colours, concepts, and feelings, too.)
- Don't rush to correct your toddler if they get in a muddle when talking. Respond with encouragement, repeating the word or phrase in the right way.
- Don't forget to keep reading, playing and singing – all good ways to help children to develop speech and language skills.
Need advice?
Our health visitors and nursery nurses are on line Monday to Friday evenings to answer your queries on feeding, sleep and child health.
A word about dummies
Speech and language therapists tend to advise against dummy use, especially after the age of one. They say that if a baby or child has a dummy in their mouth for extended periods of time, it could interfere with their ability to develop babbling and talking skills.
If your baby has a dummy, it's a good idea to restrict its use, perhaps to quiet times and bedtimes. You might also consider weaning them off it by the time they're one, or, again, keeping it for selected moments. Read more on the pros and cons of dummy use, or get tips on ditching the dummy.
Get more tips on your baby's language development below, or find out how other parents communicate with their babies in our forum:
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