A massive 95% of teenagers have access to a smartphone, so knowing who might be trying to connect with them online and what material they may see is a big concern for parents. We know they are spending lots of time on screens, but we don’t always know what they’re doing on them or who they’re talking to.

As parents we know about bullying and we worry about online sexual predators invading our child's virtual world on Snapchat, TikTok or Instagram.

That's because we're used to hearing and seeing the word grooming in connection with child sexual abuse or gangs. But there are other risks we should be aware of and find out about, too.

Grooming is also the term used by Counter Terrorism Policing (CTP) to describe the process where people are targeted and recruited into supporting terrorism or extreme views and hatred. This form of grooming is known as radicalisation.

The risks of radicalisation: what parents should think about

The transition from tween to teen to adult is not always an easy path to navigate and if your child has other issues they are struggling with, such as low self-esteem, bullying, sexual identity or feelings of not belonging and exclusion, it can be even harder.

A lot of the time these kind of issues are just a difficult but fairly normal part of growing up.

But for some young people these underlying issues can also make them vulnerable to manipulation or lead them to seek out solutions they think could solve how they are feeling.

This can sometimes mean they become involved in gangs or drug taking, and in some cases it means they become involved in extremism.

The internet has made it much easier for extremist groups to package up their ideas in engaging ways designed to hook vulnerable young people in.

It doesn’t matter what type of extremism it is (which might also be known as an ideology.) The tactics and the way they create their content is designed to normalise their messages and create an ‘extremist echo chamber’ which excludes other voices and alternative viewpoints.

Educating your child about the risks

Young people are spending more and more time online and CTP are seeing younger and younger children being exposed to extreme material and views.

Here in the UK, children as young as 12 have been targeted and groomed into supporting extremist ideologies.

That’s why it’s important to know the risks and know how to spot the signs.

Although you might feel the risk of your child becoming radicalised is really low – and in almost all cases that’s true – it’s really important to educate yourself and your child about the potential dangers. Just like you would about going off with strangers, for example.

Anyone’s child can be at risk of becoming radicalised. It doesn’t matter if they are a boy or a girl, where they live, their ethnicity or background.

But there are some factors that can make them more vulnerable to being at risk. So it is important to be aware of your child and the kind of extremism they might be vulnerable to, and most importantly to get specialist help or advice if you are concerned.

What extremist groups and ideologies should you be aware of?

According to CTP, there are a number of different types of extremists and groups ‘aggressively targeting and radicalising’ young people.

The groups tend to target people within their own communities and use the same grooming techniques as other online predators.

Extreme Right Wing groups ... they cover a broad ideological spectrum but are sometimes known as white supremacists or cultural nationalists.

They are motivated by things like racism, extreme nationalism or the desire to remove people of different nationalities, religions and cultures from the UK.

They are more likely to encourage people to commit hate crimes and they typically target Jews, Muslims and other minority groups.

Religious extremism groups ... such as extreme forms of Islamism. This is when the extremism is motivated by warped and dangerous interpretations of a specific faith.

These groups are more likely to encourage someone to commit a terrorist offence such as funding or supporting a terrorist organisation, or committing a violent act.

Other forms of religious extremism can include Sikh extremism or Hindu extremism, but CTP say they see fewer of these cases.

The Extreme Right Wing and Extreme Islamism are the two main extremism and terrorism threats in the UK at the moment. But other forms of extremism exist too, such as:

‘Incel’ ... which means ‘involuntary celibacy’.

This is a mostly online hate group involving men and boys who believe women are to blame for their sexless lives. They can also blame other men who they feel are attractive to women.

They hold extreme views about women and feminism, and can be very offensive and disrespectful towards and about women and girls. They can encourage violent acts against women, including rape.

They have created their own terminology and refer to girls and women as 'Becky' or 'Stacy' and handsome sexually active men as 'Chad'.

Extreme left wing or environmental extremism ... where people are prepared to support the use of, or commit, violent acts to support these causes.

Mixed, unstable and unclear ideologies ... these terms are used to describe people who don’t clearly identify with one specific ideology but have underlying vulnerabilities, such as mental health conditions, that can make them more susceptible to extremism.

They might relate to instances where people promote a combination of elements from multiple ideologies (mixed) or shift between different ideologies (unstable).

Or they could be where the person does not appear to identify with any ideology but is displaying a concerning interest in violence, for example searching for information and videos on mass school shootings.

If you’re worried your child is seeking out new connections, check-in with them and explore what else might be happening in their lives.

What problem might your child be having that they are trying to solve?

What are the groups or activities they are becoming involved in offering them that you or their friends and family might not?

Trust your instincts and if you notice your child’s behaviour has changed – maybe they are very angry or filled with hate – and you’re concerned, there are places you can get support.

By acting early you can help them choose a more positive pathway.

How do extremists sell themselves online?

Tweens and teenagers can be curious and challenging, push boundaries, protest, become more secretive and show a desire to right perceived wrongs and injustices.

And that’s OK. It’s totally normal teenager behaviour. 

But it can also make them vulnerable to exploitation by groups or individuals who have a different agenda.

Multi-player gaming platforms and tournaments, social media and the internet

Whilst the vast majority of young people playing multi-player video games or online gaming tournaments (or who are using social media or posting in chatrooms) are not vulnerable to being groomed by extremists, some are.

But all parents need to know the way these platforms can be misused.

• Recruiters of all ideologies ‘gamify’ their messages to attract and reach younger gamers. They can also produce their own games or merge their messaging onto mainstream gaming platforms
• They will introduce a ‘reward’ system to encourage users to post extreme messages, which will get them further up a leader board
• They can assign the person at risk a ‘role’ in the group, to help make them feel part of something and important
• They operate closed groups, which can only be accessed by invite-only – this helps the person feel special and selected
• They can use memes or comments on forums that go just slightly beyond what most of us think are okay. If a child replies or shares their post, they’ll then try and strike up a ‘friendship’ before gradually sharing even more extreme views and content
• Conspiracy theories and ‘fake news’ can lead a vulnerable person down the path of extremism if they are feeling insecure about something in their lives and need support.

Find out more about radicalisation

If you want to find out more or are worried your child is at risk of being radicalised, a great resource is CTP's ACT Early website.

It has all you need to know about radicalisation and highlights the signs it could be happening to your child. As a mum or dad, you’re in the best position to notice any changes in your child’s behaviour.

Trust your instincts: if something doesn’t feel right, there is help and support out there.

Finding out what the underlying issue is and supporting your child – perhaps they are being bullied or struggling with their mental health – can help lead them back onto the right path.

The ACT Early website also has lots of helpful advice about how to talk to your child if you're worried their behaviour has changed.

Don’t be frightened to ask for help: you can talk to your child’s school, a health professional or contact the National Police Prevent Advice Line for confidential advice on 0800 011 3764 and talk to specially trained officers about your concerns.

They are there to listen and to give advice and there’s often no need for the police to be involved at all. Instead support can be provided by your child’s school, doctor or a specialist mentor.

How to teach online social behaviour

Just as you teach your children how to be safe IRL, you can do the same for them online. Let them know if they see something that frightens or disturbs them, they can tell you about it. Encourage them to think critically about the information they are seeing and what agendas other people might have.

Teach your child to be resilient and talk about how to be digitally savvy.

It’s also important that they know that it’s illegal to post or share certain things online. If they see anything extreme, it can be reported here.