Netmums relationship course: congratulations!
You've made it to the final session of our free online course. There's just time for a quick recap of all the 'happy ever after' tips you've learned. Plus, take our relationship quiz today...
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Congratulations! You've made it to the final session of Better Together – the Netmums Relationship Course. Give yourself a big pat on the back for all the time and energy you've thrown into it.
The course was written in collaboration with OnePlusOne, the UK's leading relationships research organisation so it's packed with solid expert advice – and hopefully you're starting to see the benefits.
If you haven't signed up to the course you can have a read about what it involves and sign up here, so you'll get each instalment straight to your inbox.
Here's a recap on what you've learned so far:
- Session one: time for a check in
- Session two: understanding yourself and your partner
- Session three: interviewing your partner
- Session four: accepting difference
- Session five: finding harmony
- Session six: accepting flaws
- Session seven: daily compliments
- Session eight: learning to listen
- Session nine: building closeness
- Session 10: learning to share
- Session 11: telling out story
- Session 12: congratulations!
In this final session we're going to recap on some of the key learnings from the Six Principles of successful relationships and do a relationship check in to see how things are going. So, without further ado...
6 principles of happy relationships
Today is the final session of the relationship course. But don't worry if you've not finished all the exercises yet, you can carry on with them at your own pace – and you might want to dip in and out of them at different times.
In this session we're just going to recap on some of the key pointers covered by the course, which will hopefully soon become second nature, helping you to enjoy a more fulfilled and happy relationship.
First up, remember the Six Principles are:
There's been a lot to digest. So the following five ideas for things to keep working at might help...
1. Update your knowledge of each other
Take time to find out about each other's lives - what's happened that day, what's on the agenda tomorrow.
2. Re-connect
We know that at the end of a busy day couples are often under pressure – they're tired, children need putting to bed, everyone needs feeding – it's no wonder that this is often the peak time for arguments.
So trying to manage that time better is key to good relationship maintenance.
3. Recognise thoughtfulness
Little things can go a long way, so recognising when your partner is turning to you rather than away is important.
Being aware of how you can take care of your relationship through the things that you say and do and making the effort to be thoughtful says you've taken the time to think about your partner and what matters to them.
4. Make "us time"
Make time for each other. This doesn't mean having to arrange complicated plans to go out – it's about creating a protected time to focus on each other – listen to what's been going on, tell each other what's been happening in your lives.
Oh and have a cuddle, and watch or listen to something that you both like. The best kind of date night, no?
5. Create a 'Buffer Zone'
Showing an interest in each other, warmth and humour can protect your relationship with your partner – it's a bit like a Teflon coating that stops the bad stuff from sticking.
Try to remember it's not about getting rid of all the negative things, it's about increasing the positive to keep your relationship strong
These are some protective factors that can help cushion your relationship from tough times:
- Affection
- Supporting each other
- Time together
- Expressing and sharing feelings
- Outside support
Take our relationship quiz
Remember we asked you at the beginning of the course to think about your relationship in the context of a list of words that might be used to describe it? Well, now it's time to have another look to see how you're feeling right now.
Look again at each of the following words and select the one that best describes how you feel about your relationship at the moment (remembering that 0 represents worst and 5 represents best).
As before, base your responses on your gut reaction.
Ask yourself: how would I describe my relationship?
INTERESTING 5 4 3 2 1 0 BORING
BAD 0 1 2 3 4 5 GOOD
FULL 5 4 3 2 1 0 EMPTY
STURDY 5 4 3 2 1 0 FRAGILE
DISCOURAGING 0 1 2 3 4 5 HOPEFUL
ENJOYABLE 5 4 3 2 1 0 MISERABLE
- A score of 25-30 means your relationship is in good shape
- 20-25 means your relationship is strong, but there's room for improvement
- 15-20 means your relationship needs some work to re-build your sense of partnership
- 10-15 means your relationship needs some work re-building the basics
- 0-10 means your relationship is struggling.
How does your score at the beginning compare with today's score? Can you see how far you've come?
Perhaps there are things that might still need a bit of your time and attention to improve? That's totally normal. As you have only been working on this course for a few weeks you may find that your original score has not altered much.
Sometimes working through things will raise difficult or uncomfortable issues and you may even feel less satisfied with your relationship for a while. But as one previous course participant said, you can't fix something until you know what's broken!
Making a change
Do you remember we asked you at the beginning to think about two or three things you might like to change in your relationship? Did you write them down?
Take a look at them now and see whether you have made any progress towards improving the things that you highlighted at the beginning.
Remember, the aim of this course is about making a start on improving your relationship, rather than achieving overnight change, so be realistic in your assessment.
Even more support
It can really help to know you're not the only one that feels their relationship is rocky (despite what all the #couplegoals Facebook posts might have you believe). So check out our Better Together Relationships Course chat forum below to find out how others are getting on with the course and share relationship woes/wins...
We hope you've found the course useful – and don't forget you can dip back into it whenever your relationship needs a little TLC.
In the meantime, you might be interested in one of our other courses:
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