Babysitting: advice and info for a safe and happy experience
All parents deserve some time-out from the kids, to enjoy the company of their partner (you might actually get to finish a conversation!), have an uninterrupted meal (cooked by someone else, of course) or just a nice glass of wine at the pub.
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But not all of us have the luxury of trusted family members close at hand to act as babysitters and be on call for childcare and babysitting services.
If sorting out a babysitter has proved difficult for you and, as a consequence, you've not had an evening out for ages, let Netmums help you. We've got some tips and advice on all things babysitting related, from how to set up a babysitting circle to sourcing local babysitting and childcare services to ensure you find a babysitter that is professional, reliable and - most importantly - one both you and your child are happy with. Don't forget to check out our childcare in the home page for information on nannies and au pairs, and your local childcare board for details of services available in your area.
Setting up a babysitting circle
Setting up a babysitting circle is an ideal way to tackle the problem of evening childcare. By setting up a circle with your friends you'll have a pool of trusted individuals to call on for babysitting, and you'll be paying for their services by repaying the favour and babysitting for their children. You don't have to restrict your services to evenings, either. You might prefer to use some time out to get your hair done, do some shopping or meet your partner in town for lunch.
Babysitting circles can be as big or small as you want though it's perhaps best to keep numbers manageable so you're not constantly on babysitting duty. Around 5-10 members is the ideal. You and your circle of friends can arrange rotas and rules amongst yourself - some circles operate on a points/credits systems - or you can simply make arrangements on trust.
If you're going to run a credits system whereby members are given a 'tab' (of, say, 25 credits with each credit being worth an amount of time which is added to and subtracted as you use and provide babysitting services) you'll need to ensure all members of the group keep a tally (circulate a notebook in which all the details can be recorded) and that the sitter and the person they've sat for signs the book at the end of the evening. That way you'll avoid any quibbles over what has been provided.
There are several online systems which you can register with to set up an online babysitting circle which takes out some of the administration and might be a more convenient way to record the details of your club. Check out The Baby Bank and My Night Off which provide online systems to administer your club free of charge.
But however you choose to set up your club there are some ground rules you should establish at the outset:
- Be sure all members of the group are committed to the idea - you don't want to feel you're encroaching on someone's time and inconveniencing them if you ask them to babysit for you.
- Everyone in the circle should know each other so everyone feels comfortable with the situation whoever is babysitting for them. Consider new members to the group carefully and make sure everyone is happy with extending the circle.
- There should be a reasonable frequency to the contribution each member makes.
- If you're asking for babysitting in the day, take into account the fact that they will have their own children to look after too so be sure they can manage with the extra responsibility.
- Make sure everyone has an up-to-date list of contact numbers for the members of the circle.
- And, perhaps most importantly, don't abuse the system - it's important that the circle operates on a very equal basis so everyone gets the same amount of babysitting. If not you may find yourself losing friends!
Using an agency
Babysitting agencies are available nationwide. As with all things child-related it's important to make the appropriate checks on an agency so you can be sure they are reputable and professional. A personal recommendation from a friend is helpful, but ultimately it's your decision to make so you should do your research carefully before you commit to anything, especially as pretty much all agencies will charge a one-off registration fee above the fee you pay each time you use an agency's services.
When considering an agency, check out its literature and website - you'll get a gut instinct if something doesn't look professional. A good agency will be happy to tell you all about the way it operates; its vetting process (whether babysitters are interviewed face to face, for example) and the background checks it conducts; the childcare experience its sitters must have; how the fee structure works (do certain days of the year, such as New Year's Eve, incur an additional cost, for example); what is it insured against, etc, etc.
Basically, as with choosing a childminder or nursery you must do the appropriate checks before you sign up to an agency and feel 100% comfortable about using its services.
Two agencies which operate across the country are Safehands (tel: 0870 844 6688) and Sitters (tel: 08447 367 367) - both are well established and offer both daytime and night time babysitting services. If you live in the capital Sitting Pretty Babysitters operates across London and supplies a 'boutique' service (free ironing included!) with professional, fully CRB-checked sitters who are interviewed face-to-face by the company as an extra vetting precaution. Find our more on the Sitting Pretty Babysitters website.
You can find more details about the sort of police checks carried out for childminders - which are applicable to babysitters registered with an agency too - on our Childcare in the Home page. Also on this page is a list of questions we recommend you put to a prospective childminder - again, these have relevancy for you when choosing an agency so you might like to use them as a guideline for questions to ask the agency about the staff they employ.
Finding a local babysitter / babysitting help
If there is no agency that operates in your area or the cost is prohibitive you can consider looking for independent local babysitting. This can come in a variety of forms and with varying experience so it's vitally important to conduct your own careful checks on prospective sitters as you won't have the weight of an agency behind you to provide quality control.
Again, personal recommendations are useful so ask your friends who they use - a trusted friend won't put you in touch with anyone they wouldn't be happy to look after their own children. Other good sources of local babysitters include school, pre-school, playgroup and nursery notice boards. Quite often you'll find other mums offer their services via these boards, for example. Childcare students or recently graduated childcare students looking for practical experience may also advertise. And of course you could place your own advert - as well as local notice boards you could place an advert on your local Netmums childcare board. This dedicated board also includes postings from babysitters looking for work - well worth a look!
There's nothing to stop you using a trusted teenager that you know but you have to feel absolutely confident that they have the necessary skills to look after young children and deal with an emergency should one arise. And, of course, be convinced they won't run up a huge phone bill, have their boyfriend round or help themselves to the drinks cabinet! This might seem a cliched view of the way teenagers behave, but you do need to ensure tht boundaries and guidelines are given regards the way your home is treated, as well as your children!
Important guidelines for all babysitting
- Whichever babysitting option you opt for there are some golden rules you should follow, both before you take on a babysitter and each time you use their services. The recommendations below include advice offered by the NSPCC to ensure you and your child are happy with your babysitting facility:
- Always check references and registrations yourself, whether you use an agency or individual for your babysitting.
- Be sure to conduct a face-to-face interview with prospective babysitters - you can use the questions featured on our childcare in the home page as a basis of what to ask.
- Always follow your instincts - never employ anyone you have any niggling worry about.
- Choose a babysitter over 16 years of age.
- Ensure your child is happy with your decision and ensure they have met with the babysitter ahead of the first occasion you use them.
- If your child expresses any unhappiness or discomfort with a babysitter, find someone else.
- Make sure your babysitter has First Aid training, in particular CPR. You may like to consider offering to pay for them to do a First Aid course if they don't have these skills for added reassurance. The St John Ambulance and British Red Cross both offer a variety of nationwide first aid courses.
- Make your sitter familiar with your child's routine and foibles - if they must have their blanky in bed with them at night, whether the landing light should be left on for them, etc. And more importantly make sure they know of any allergies your child has or other medical conditions. If they may require medication in your absence make sure the sitter has clear instructions for administering this medicine.
- Always leave contact numbers with the sitter before you leave, as well as a next of kin number as an added security.
- Be clear about house rules - is your sitter allowed to use the computer, for example, while they're sitting for you? Are you happy for them to help themselves to food and drink? It's important to set boundaries like these at the outset to avoid any misunderstandings or embarrassment later.
- Be considerate towards your babysitter - don't just disappear off for the evening without a second glance! Always thank them for their services and offer them a drink/biscuits/snacks etc before you leave.
- Always return home at the time you said you said you would.
