My husband says I am not compatible with him

I find myself in a very strange situation. The past few days have been so hard for me and today its just been too much to take in.

My husband and I got into a tiff yesterday. His parents are supposed to come over this weekend and I wanted to know when will they be coming over so that I can prepare. In this instance he refused to call his mum, rightly so because he said our toddler may get upset because hes attached to his grandma and when they come over he lashes out once they leave as his frustration is why is Grandma and Grandpa leaving me. He then takes it out at school and we have had to deal with his emotions. My husband was adamant not to call his mum in front of him but yet he did not want to think about what I told him that regardless he calls her or they come over, once our toddler sees them he will be overwhelmed and excited and emotionally will be upset when they leave to go home.

I tried to explain to him, and he just kept saying stop being a bad parent, and sit down and have dinner with your son. Perhaps he was right but he then said He wants to just kill himself than to stay with me.

I didnt say anything and carried on eating my dinner and later before my sons bedtime he shouted at me for putting him in a place and he called his mum to find out when shes coming because she was the one being difficult and not letting us know and then our toddler saw he was talking to Grandma so my husband could not get a word in and now he makes me hear that he is in an awkward relationship with her all over again because of me. He even said that he wished he listened to his mum because we are not compatible. We aren’t compatible parents either. It really really hurt me.

Today he apologised to me and said hes sorry but still I was the one who ignited the fire. I didn’t talk to him much the whole day because I was still overcoming what he said to me about compatibility and I know he said it out of anger because he said he never said that when he did.

He then Proceeded to ask me why I couldn’t explain for myself and our argument yesterday when I did several times and he shouted at me and he would shut me down. I am at that stage where I am shutting down my feelings and refuse to even explain and when I do this he says I dont care about our relationship at all! And then he picked out saying oh you dont want my parents to come over then is it? Fine dont say what it is Ill go and tell my mum. The problem isn’t them coming over, the feedback was how he reacted to when I told him to simply call his mum and ask when are they planning to come over so that I can arrange for food etc. He started threatening me emotionally and emotionally blackmailing him when I refused to explain because then when I did he picked out saying I had poor english and that he wanted honest communication nothing beat around the bush.

ill be honest, I am in tears and extremely hurt today. Couple of days ago was my birthday and he was fine and now he's turned into a beast. I don’t know how to react, I feel sick in my tummy, and I did not sleep until 4am yesterday. Maybe I am overthinking it too much, but the way he threatened me emotionally I never expected him to treat me this way.

i hope someone out there can just give me some comfort. Im sorry if the above is also not clearly understandable, clearly I just cannot explain myself. :(