Autism and behaviour
4 answers /
Last post: 12/05/2022 at 5:29 pm
Hi there . I’d like some advice / opinions from parents of kids with ASD. This post is not in any way meant to be judgemental etc . I’d like a better understanding .
My new partner has an 8 year old who goes to a non mainstream school as she has ASD - she speaks and is high functioning (maths especially )
I work in mainstream primary , therefore my experience of ASD has been around those who follow whole school expectations etc .
I am aware routines etc are important eg visuals etc but how are new experiences / people introduced to children ?
I get the vibe from him that she works herself up so much that they just don’t want to rock the boat and so just stick to what they know she will allow / tolerate .
He attempted to introduce me to her but she refused and wouldn’t allow me to go to the park either .
I am happy not to push it .
His daughter has no siblings and is the only grandchild on her dad’s side . He has set days with her a week which is precious time I know .
Are boundaries / expectations different with autism ?
I feel slightly she dictates / rules the roost slightly , so want to better understand it .
TIA and I hope this hasn’t offended anyone as it wasn’t intended to , it’s a genuine curiosity .
Hey, my son is ASD and can get very upset even if we have to take a different route home so his thinking is similarly very rigid. Has your partner tried showing photos of you? Seems like something very small but when I introduce my son to anyone new like friends children etc. that I know he’ll be meeting soon I have photos that I show and leave them with him to look through on his own and he asks certain questions and I tell positive stories about them. You really want the first meeting to be a good one because they can hold on to that memory for a very long time. Also I’d just like to say that his daughter has no control over how her brain works and probably has no idea she’s “ruling the roost”. The most important thing is that she’s comfortable meeting you so that you can all spend more time together in the future.
Hey, my son is ASD and can get very upset even if we have to take a different route home so his thinking is similarly very rigid. Has your partner tried showing photos of you? Seems like something very small but when I introduce my son to anyone new like friends children etc. that I know he’ll be meeting soon I have photos that I show and leave them with him to look through on his own and he asks certain questions and I tell positive stories about them. You really want the first meeting to be a good one because they can hold on to that memory for a very long time. Also I’d just like to say that his daughter has no control over how her brain works and probably has no idea she’s “ruling the roost”. The most important thing is that she’s comfortable meeting you so that you can all spend more time together in the future.
Thanks for your reply and definitely food for thought for me (the ruling the roost especially - )
I shall suggest the photos etc.
In the meantime I’ll remain patient !
My two kids are teenagers so are hardly welcoming to him either (grunts etc 🙈)
Thanks for your reply and definitely food for thought for me (the ruling the roost especially - )
I shall suggest the photos etc.
In the meantime I’ll remain patient !
My two kids are teenagers so are hardly welcoming to him either (grunts etc 🙈)
I can be bloody hard blending families at the best of times so hats off to you for doing it and remaining as patient as you have. It’ll come together eventually it just takes some time. Best of luck to you all and hope you make some progress soon.